LotS/The Story/Talia's Team/Team Building

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Team Building

Team Building
Team Building

So there I was. Me -- a captain. Pretty weird, huh? I knew the first time someone called me that, I'd turn around and expect to see you there. But I guess we're both captains now, captain.

There was just one little problem... I didn't have a team. That's kind of the first thing you need when you want to play thugby. Well, maybe the ball. But after you have the ball, it's the next thing. Did you hear what happened to the Sian Dragons? The old ones, I mean. The rest of us only found out after we got Sian back, and I don't know how much you've been watching the news networks.

When the Centurians attacked, the Dragons put on their armor and went out to fight them. They were gunned down in front of the stadium, trying to protect people who'd taken shelter inside. Every last one of them. There's a statue of them there now. Wu had it put up, even though he's always hated thugby players.

So, I needed to find some new recruits. And since I didn't really know any athletes, I figured I'd have to improvise...



"I thought an assassin would be hard to sneak up on."

"I'm not an assassin." She turned around, pulling the guy she was garroting round with her -- so he ended up between us. His tongue was hanging out like a happy dog's. The rest of him didn't look so happy though. "I'm just a concerned citizen. And you didn't sneak up on me. I recognized your footsteps and knew you weren't a threat."

"I'm kind of insulted... My superior officers always used to say I was a threat to the rest of the squadron whenever I got in the cockpit."

"Did Wu Tenchu tell you I was here?"

'Here' was an abandoned toy factory. The Centurians closed it down back when they took over. Guess the jerks didn't like stuffed bears.

"Yeah, he said you were taking care of something for him. What did this guy do?" I pointed at the man she was choking. He reached out, like he wanted me to help him. But if Wu Tenchu wanted him dead, I figured he'd done something to deserve it...

"He informed for the Centurian Collective during the occupation."

"I think they have trials to handle that kind of thing..."

"He covered his tracks too well for that. Besides, my way's quicker. What do you want, Talia?"

Typical Lucia the Cobra. No small talk, no asking how I'd been. I could see why Wu hired her to help clean things up. She was his kind of woman.

"You're pretty fast, right? And good at fighting."

"Yes. Your point?"

She dropped the guy. He fell face-first into a pile of Happy Lucky Bears. I used to love those things as a kid...

"How would you like to play thugby?"

"What?"

"It's this sport where-"

"I know what thugby is."

"Great! Then you're already qualified! I-"

"Wu Tenchu sent you here to ask me that?"

"I told him I wanted you for my team. I'm captain of the Sian Dragons now."

"Since when does he care about thugby?"

"Since we got challenged by the Drekchester Megas."

Oh, yeah... Sorry, [Player Name]. I probably should have mentioned that earlier. What can I say? I suck at storytelling.

"The Megas? Don't those idiots know the whole team got slaughtered?"

"Pretty sure that's why they challenged us. The Dragons beat them in the last three matches. They want a chance to get their own back, and probably don't think whatever team we throw together will stand a chance."

"Wu should just tell them to go to hell. Or send me to Drekchester to shut them up..."

"That's what I said, but he said the match would 'show the galaxy that the newly liberated Sian Empire is ready to resume its place in the interstellar community'."

"That sounds like something he'd say."

"Personally, I think he just didn't want to lose face in front of the Megas. Anyway, he said it would be great PR to have a hero of the liberation as team captain."

"And you got stuck with the job."

"Yeah. So, how about it? Want to join up? We have fancy uniforms and everything!"



Then I went clubbing.

The Galloping Galaxy was holding its big reopening. You should see the place now -- they rebuilt the whole thing twice as high as it was before, and added a new low gravity room. I knew the guy I wanted to see was going to be there.

I wore something slutty, had a few Tygers (hey, I like the stripes!), and went onto the main dance floor to do my thing. Didn't take long for someone to grope me. Just what I was waiting for. I turned round and punched him out. That got Virgil's attention.

You remember Virgil, right? He used to be a doorman on Cythera. He stuck around on Sian, and ended up becoming Galloping Galaxy's head of security. I'd tried to get in touch with him, but he was busy sorting stuff out for the reopening. So I got creative, and ended up in his office (the guy I floored got thrown out -- sucks to be him!). It was pretty cool in there. He had these big screens all over the walls, ceiling, and even the floor. They showed everything in the club. It was like having x-ray vision or something.

"Tonight of all nights?" he said. He had this frown on. Maybe it was the Tyger, Tyger, but I thought it made him look all cute and serious. "You had to cause trouble while all those media people are here covering our reopening?"

"Hey, most of the reporters were too wasted to see anything..." I pointed at one of the screens on the floor. That woman from Channel 509 was in a hallway, pressing this young guy against the wall and pretty much sucking his face off. "Besides, you'll get great publicity out of it. Don't mean to brag, but I'm hot stuff at the moment."

"You have a point..."

"Anyway, I needed to talk to you. And you weren't returning my calls."

"I've been busy."

"Me too. That's why I'm here. I'm putting a thugby team together, and you'd be perfect for it."

"Huh? You think every big black guy just happens to be good at thugby?"

"No. But the ones who went to university on a thugby scholarship? Probably."

"You know about that?"

"Hey, I'm not just a pretty face and a pair of guns!"

He glanced down.

"Not those ones! The ones I shoot people with!"

"Oh..."

"Anyway, I checked to see if I knew anyone who used to be an athlete, and I came up with you. So, want to play for the Dragons?"

"No chance. My thugby days are behind me."

"We're playing the Drekchester Megas."

"Then count me in."

"Heh. Yeah, I figured you'd say that. When I was reading up on your bio, I saw your blog. Not a fan of Drekchester, huh?"

"Have you heard the way they talk there? It's like they took ancient Greek and fed her chems until she became a drugged-up slut! As a classics major, it pisses me off." He got that look on his face, the one he gets when he's about to say something fancy that no one else understands. "It fills me with anger equal to the wrath of Achilles -- the direful spring of woes unnumbered!"

"Yeah... If you say so."



Things were going pretty well. I may not be as great as you are when it comes to recruiting people, or like Illaria was, but I can get the job done. Plus I got lucky. I found out that a bunch of Niflung thugby players were stranded on Sian. They came for the battle, helped us fight the Centurians, then started drinking to celebrate. A couple of months later they were still drinking, and ended up selling their ship for beer money. Niflungs...

I got Wu Tenchu to settle their tab and give them a new ship if they agreed to play. But they probably would have done it for free anyway. When their team didn't hear back from them, they thought they'd died in the battle -- and had them replaced. So playing the Drekchester Megas was a way for them to get back into the game. Maybe even impress some of the Niflung teams they wanted to play for.

I hit up some kwoons as well, to fill out the team with kung fu experts. If you can kick someone's head off, you can kick a ball, right? Most of them told me to get lost. The masters said stuff about how thugby killed the soul and diminished your chi. Pretty lame, huh? But I went to one of those modern kwoons, the kind of place where the cybered-up kung fu guys train. They were up for it, so I picked out the ones who didn't have too many implants.

After that, I just wanted one more player. We needed more beef in the team, someone big and heavy to help out in the scrum. And I knew where to find him. I just had to follow the sound of crying restaurant owners.

I don't think you ever met Guan Chao. He used to compete in Twisted Steel as 'Great Wall' Guan. They called him that because he's big, and he beat up the Mongol Horde (a stable of fighters, not the real Mongol horde -- I think the Mongolians stopped having hordes a while back). He went out and helped fight in the streets when we needed that distraction. And in the last battle, while you and me were fighting in front of the palace, he took out a whole Storm squad single-handed. Just charged into them and beat them to death with his bare hands. Well, okay... He was wearing a battlesuit. So not exactly 'bare' hands. Still damn good though.

He was given a medal for that, just like the ones the rest of us got. And pretty much every restaurant on the planet said they'd give free meals for life to any customer who had one...

I found him sitting at a table, covered with plates and plates of dim sum (the table, I mean -- not Guan). He was using two pairs of chopsticks, and demolishing everything -- shoving food into his mouth as fast as his hands could move. The owner and his wife were arguing in the kitchen. She wanted to throw Guan out before they went broke.

"Hey, Guan... How'd you feel about playing thugby?"

He didn't answer. Pretty sure he heard me, but he didn't want to stop eating long enough to talk. I waited for him to finish, but the owner won the argument -- and waiters kept bringing out more dim sum. So Guan just kept on eating. Until I pulled my pistol out and blew the ends off his chopsticks.

The waiters started yelling, and some of the customers ducked for cover. But the owner's wife gave me a round of applause.

"As I was saying... Would you like to play thugby?"

"Fine! Fine! Whatever! Just bring me more chopsticks!"